coming soon
a short film about peeing / not peeing
about the film
I (Steven Jackson, director of the film, hi) have had a shy bladder for most of my life. After years of coping with it as best as I can and keeping it a secret from friends and family, I've finally decided to do something about it — and make a documentary about the whole thing.
In addition to documenting my personal process, I'm taking a deep dive into all things shy bladder: what is known about the disorder, its causes and treatments; the history of shy bladder and its place in popular culture; potential design and policy solutions, and more.
My goal is not only to tell my story, but also to shed light on a largely invisible social phobia and its sufferers. Zooming out even further, I hope to tell a deeper story about anxiety, vulnerability, and the road to self-acceptance.
what is shy bladder?
Shy bladder syndrome, known officially as paruresis, is a social anxiety disorder. Those suffering from paruresis are fearful of urinating (or, more to the point, failing to urinate) in the presence of others. Symptoms range from the simply inconvenient to the downright debilitating, interfering with virtually every aspect of one's life.
Paruresis stats are very hard to come by. Experts I've talked to suggest it affects about 7% of the population in North America, with worldwide prevalence hovering around 4 percent.
The causes of paruresis are unknown, but it is treatable. Studies show that cognitive-behavioral therapy, specifically graduated exposure therapy, is one of the most effective treatments.
For more information, check out the International Paruresis Association, a non-profit focused on paruresis education, advocacy, and treatment.
the team
STEVEN JACKSON (Director) is an award winning producer, sound designer and composer. He has produced and reported stories for This American Life, Short Cuts, Love + Radio, 99% Invisible, Audible, and others. He has worked on series such as The Trojan Horse Affair, Cryptoland, and You Didn’t See Nothin (2023 Third Coast Award: Best Serialized Story). He lives in Portland, Maine, where he sometimes teaches at the Salt Institute for Documentary Studies and very frequently jumps in the ocean.
KAITLYN SCHWALJE (Producer) is an award winning science journalist and documentary director based in Portland, Maine. Before pivoting to storytelling, Kaitlyn designed haptic prototypes for the research division of the Walt Disney Company. Her stories about her disaster-obsessed father, tsunamis, and city squirrels appear in National Geographic, WNYC, CBC, Atlas Obscura, and others. Director credits include Snowy (Sundance ’21, Time, Critics Choice nominee, DOCNYC Shortlist).
ALEX WOLF LEWIS (Producer/Cinematographer) is a director and DP based in NYC and Portland, Maine. He has travelled the world for work, shooting for Anthony Bourdain: Parts Unknown, Vice, Netflix, HBO, PBS, A&E, as well as a number of feature documentaries and shorts. Director credits include Single Room Occupancy (co-directed), Hildegarde’s Piano (Rooftop Film Festival ’19), and Snowy (Sundance ’21). When not making films, he volunteers as an EMT for the town of Falmouth, Maine.
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